Tuesday 8 January 2013

Post-Holiday Movie Reviews




Les Miserables
‘I love you more than the stars and the moon and my own bum! You are a special little blonde boy who gets shot in a revolutionary cause! You are the world. No, sorry, I got that wrong…we are the world!' Not since Rent has there been SUCH a FILM! It’s just so goddamn inspiring I could like, shit in my pants and then eat it.

Anna Karenina
It’s kinda interestingly directed and Raphaël Personnazrprise (Vronsky) looks fucking fabulous naked on a bed.

Django Unchained
Well at least it wasn’t boring like Planet Terror.

Parental Guidance / Guilt Trip
Please. Enough already. If all Hollywood can think of to do with Bette and Barbra is to put them in shit like this now we might as well all just pack up our dildoes and die.

Central Park Five
Best.
Holiday.
Movie.
Ever.
No,
really.